I ate tomato soup for dinner tonight, followed by an ice cream bar. The mixture of hot and cold in my belly reminded me of a time at Grandma's house when we ate soup. She offered us "paddle pops" as usual after supper and I remember you warning me as I went to take a bite that the mixture of hot and cold is what caused storms - hurricanes and tornadoes. I'm pretty sure that was the slowest I have ever eaten ice cream.
P.S. I think someone will definitely buy your house and turn it into a museum. Or at least a fun house with crazy mirrors - plus, in that case, you wouldn't have to paint after all.